Thursday, September 24, 2009

AP Thursdays MOC Interview: Elita from Blacktating

Name: Elita

Age: Almost 31

How old is your child(ren)?
21 months

How did you come to be an Attachment Parent?
I actually always had certain beliefs about pregnancy and parenting and I always knew I wanted an all-natural birth, to breastfeed and cloth diaper, because those are the things my mother did with me. When I was pregnant, I reconnected with an old friend on MySpace and we began emailing back and forth. I told her about my pregnancy and how I was seeing a midwife for childbirth classes and I was nervous about a hospital birth because I didn't want any medical interventions. I asked her to recommend some books to me on pregnancy and parenting. She immediately responded, "Oh, it sounds like you're going to be practicing Attachment Parenting" and recommended Dr. Sears' The Baby Book. At first I was like, "Attachment parenting? Is she nuts?" but I picked up the book and everything seemed to fall into place. Yes, this is what I wanted to do with my child. It was everything I intuitively felt and believed, confirmed for me by a doctor.

What do you enjoy most about Attachment Parenting?
I love that my son is secure in the knowledge that I will always be there for him. When I see how well he is turning out, how smart and independent, I know that we are doing the right thing.

What do you enjoy the least?
Feeling like I have to defend my parenting choices to strangers, family and friends. So many ideas about child rearing that are mainstream and considered "normal" just don't work for me. I hate that people have no qualms about telling me how I'm going to spoil or ruin my child, how he'll never sleep alone, will still be nursing in college, etc. For some reason, AP beliefs seem to be up for ridicule. I would NEVER talk to another parent that way about their choices, even it was something I didn't agree with, like using cry it out.

What would you tell other MOC's about Attachment Parenting?
When you are able to follow your instincts and nurture your baby the way your guts tells you to, everything is easier. Breastfeeding is not only better for your baby, but bonds you to him in a way that bottle-feeding can't. Learning how to discipline our kids without physical force could make such a difference in the entire community. Think about how much violence there is in the black community and all of it starts in the home, with corporal punishment. We need to let go of some of those "old school" ways if we want to heal our community. Attachment Parenting gives you the tools to raise your baby in a way that is healthy and loving.

What do you think is the most common misconception about Attachment Parenting?
That people who practice AP are hippies who don't discipline their kids. I don't hit my son, but he is definitely disciplined and even at a young age knows right from wrong.

Do you blog or twitter? What is your link?
Yes, I blog about breastfeeding at Blacktating ( and you can also find me on twitter. I'm @Blacktating (


  1. Nice profile! I have been trying to submit mine, but the emails keep bouncing back. Do you have another email addy?

  2. Elita is awesome - I'm so glad you featured her, I always enjoy reading about her mommyhood/breastfeeding experiences. She's a wealth of information!


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