Some of you may know that in my "spare time" (like a mother of three who works FT has spare time), I write. I've currently written two scripts, one a dramatic short (30 min or less movie) and a comedy sitcom pilot. I've always wanted to be a writer, but just got into screenwriting in the last two years. I've always loved movies and am an avid movie watcher, but writing movies is a bit like creating magic (if it gets made) and this video pretty much sums up why I want to make movies.
This post contains sponsored links from the MPAA. Although this post is sponsored, all opinions are my own.
Although, I'm always told I can pass for someone who's straight out of college and still get carded when I order a drink, it doesn't mean my skin isn't aging. When you're in your twenties you can wake up and look almost flawless with ease, but in your thirties those sneaky little signs of aging start to creep in. For me it's been in the form of more noticeable pores on my cheeks and a little bit of *GASP* wrinkling under my eyes. So in order to keep my skin looking as young as possible I've heightened my skincare routine.
In my late teens and twenties my skincare battle was keeping acne at bay (Proactiv was the only thing that did it consistently and didn't wreck my non acne-covered skin), but in my thirties I'm dealing with the double whammy of acne and aging, AGHHHH!
Anywho, one of my goals for myself is to take better care of myself, that means my skin, diet, health (mental & physical), and style. So for my skin I went to Make Up Artist's Choice (MUAC) for my new skincare regimen. I'd bought some of their products in August and really enjoyed them, but I wanted to step up my regimen to minimize the appearance of my pores, but if you don't have that issue then my old regimen should be sufficient.
Blemish Buster Cleanser (daily)
Gly-Luronic Acid Serum (daily)
Green Tea & Pomegranate Moisturizer (daily)
Mandelic Acid Cleanser (daily)
Mandelic/Saliclyic Peel (weekly)
Green Tea & Pomegranate Moisturizer (daily)
Acne Oil Control Gel/Pore Minimizer (daily - when I remember)
If you're looking for good quality products for your skin (no matter your age or skin type) I highly recommend MUAC. You can get 25% using the following affiliate link - http://go.referralcandy.com/share/S3R7HQM
ETA: I was not compensated for this post, I wholly believe in these products.
I am a HUGE fan of Jess Lively and her podcast, The Lively Show. She always has such great guests and last week was no exception, when she featured blogger Caroline ofUnfancy. Caroline is a self proclaimed "unlikely fashion blogger" who documents her outfits that she creates with ONLY 37 PIECES on her blog! That's INCLUDING shoes! She calls it her capsule wardrobe and you can read more about that here.
So, I'm all about trying to live with intention and trying to live a minimalist lifestyle, so I too am attempting to create a fall/winter capsule collection and pare down my own closet. I started by downloading her FREE WORKSHEETthat aims to get at the heart of your fashion personality so you can reduce your closet AND buy things you love.
I started last weekend and the first thing that happened was I
got really overwhelmed. Why do I have so much shit, but still feel like I have nothing to wear! Well it's because I buy stuff that's not "me" and then keep it around in my closet because I bought it. Then I begrudgingly wear it, but never feel like it's something I love. So after losing my mind for a minute. I started divying up things and I still am, but I feel better about the direction my wardrobe is heading in. I'll update you all when I've completed my collection (I'm giving myself a $600 budget).
*My cheat: I've signed up with Le Tote where I am able to rent unlimited clothing and accessories over the internet. So, I'm able to supplement my wardrobe for a monthly fee and/or buy items I love for a discounted price!
I love my life. I have three TV shows at work and I have three daughters at home. And it’s all amazing, and I am truly happy. And people are constantly asking me, how do you do it? And usually, they have this sort of admiring and amazed tone.
Shonda, how do you do it all?
Like I’m full of magical magic and special wisdom-ness or something.
How do you do it all?
And I usually just smile and say like, “I’m really organized.” Or if I’m feeling slightly kindly, I say, “I have a lot of help.”
And those things are true. But they also are not true.
And this is the thing that I really want to say. To all of you. Not just to the women out there. Although this will matter to you women a great deal as you enter the work force and try to figure out how to juggle work and family. But it will also matter to the men, who I think increasingly are also trying to figure out how to juggle work and family. And frankly, if you aren’t trying to figure it out, men of Dartmouth, you should be. Fatherhood is being redefined at a lightning-fast rate. You do not want to be a dinosaur.
So women and men of Dartmouth: As you try to figure out the impossible task of juggling work and family and you hear over and over and over again that you just need a lot of help or you just need to be organized or you just need to try just a little bit harder … as a very successful woman, a single mother of three, who constantly gets asked the question “How do you do it all?” For once I am going to answer that question with 100 percent honesty here for you now. Because it’s just us. Because it’s our fireside chat. Because somebody has to tell you the truth.
Shonda, how do you do it all?
The answer is this: I don’t.
Whenever you see me somewhere succeeding in one area of my life, that almost certainly means I am failing in another area of my life.
If I am killing it on a Scandal script for work, I am probably missing bath and story time at home. If I am at home sewing my kids’ Halloween costumes, I’m probably blowing off a rewrite I was supposed to turn in. If I am accepting a prestigious award, I am missing my baby’s first swim lesson. If I am at my daughter’s debut in her school musical, I am missing Sandra Oh’s last scene ever being filmed at Grey’s Anatomy. If I am succeeding at one, I am inevitably failing at the other. That is the tradeoff. That is the Faustian bargain one makes with the devil that comes with being a powerful working woman who is also a powerful mother. You never feel a hundred percent OK; you never get your sea legs; you are always a little nauseous. Something is always lost.
Something is always missing.
And yet. I want my daughters to see me and know me as a woman who works. I want that example set for them. I like how proud they are when they come to my offices and know that they come to Shondaland. There is a land and it is named after their mother. In their world, mothers run companies. In their world, mothers own Thursday nights. In their world, mothers work. And I am a better mother for it. The woman I am because I get to run Shondaland, because I get write all day, because I get to spend my days making things up, that woman is a better person—and a better mother. Because that woman is happy. That woman is fulfilled. That woman is whole. I wouldn’t want them to know the me who didn’t get to do this all day long. I wouldn’t want them to know the me who wasn’t doing.
I don't know where the phrase, "If you think you can or you think you can't, either way you're right." came from and I'm not going to Google it either, but it's something that has always stuck with me. Now science is backing that adage up with the new study that shows that the brains of successful people vs unsuccessful people actually looks different.
A person with a "fixed" mindset tends to view themselves with static traits and a deterministic outlook. For these people, intelligence, character and creative ability all cannot be changed in any meaningful way, while success is seen as affirmation of those given abilities and traits. The fixed mindset views the human almost like an already-completed spreadsheet, with things like intelligence and personality operating as unchanging, fundamental characteristics. Thus, "striving for success and avoiding failure at all costs become a way of maintaining the sense of being smart or skilled."
A person with a "growth" mindset, on the other hand, sees challenges as things to overcome and views failure as an opportunity for growth and personal development.
If you're a parent praise your children for their effort no matter the outcome instead of giving out empty praise of "you're smart", so that they will always strive to do better. And for yourself, keep persevering you're an ever evolving and growing person and your success or skill is not a fixed point.
So, I've tackled my FB addiction as a way to simplify my life as well as make myself more efficient and so far, so good. I've gained at least an hour a day (more like 4 hours to be honest). So, now I'm in the midst of tackling another virtual mess, my Inbox.
I regularly open my Gmail to a whopping 1000 emails, which makes getting to the important stuff super hard. This is even with Gmail's newest efforts to compartmentalize our e-clutter with the primary tab, the promotions tab, and the social tab, which has helped tremendously, but still not enough. So, last week I went through a good chunk of my emails and UNSUBSCRIBED to all these automatic emails I've been getting that's been cluttering up my inbox. Democratic Committee, see ya in Nov. Change.org, I'll go to you when I want to sign a petition. Ebay alerts, I don't need a weekly reminder about wrap skirts, thank you very much. You get the point. So, although I'm not down to where I want to be, slowly, but surely I'm conquering the e-clutter!
Yesterday I deactivated my Facebook. Anyone who knows me well, knows how MAJOR that is! It is MAJOR, MAJOR! I love social media, I love all things online (except comments sections, NEVER READ THE COMMENTS SECTIONS!!!), but my love for the online world has been inhibiting my ambitions.
There is a buttload, BUTTLOAD I SAY of things I want to accomplish for 2014 and here it is almost half the year is gone and what have I done! What have I done, I ask you??? Well, I've done some things, but not nearly enough on my barometer of success. And one of the things that's been sucking up my time and energy has been FACEBOOK aka THE DEBIL, THE DEBIL, THE DEBIL!
Okay, maybe not the debil, but I've found myself getting drawn into the time suck that is Facebook instead of banging out my 2014 goals. So, I said to myself, Self, get your ass off of Facebook and continue kicking ass in the real world. Then I replied to myself...just kidding, only crazy people REPLY to themselves. Talking to yourself, fine. Replying, one way ticket to crazy town.
Now here's the paradox of Facebook, Facebook is a GREAT marketing tool. How will you market all your kick ass stuff if you're not on Facebook? Well, I've kept my Facebook Pages for my "stuff" and used one of my business accounts to be the administrator while deactivating my personal account. This way I can take advantage of the good parts of Facebook, while not engaging in the Vampire like aspects of it.
Will I miss Facebook? I don't know yet. I think the biggest thing I'll miss about Facebook is being connected to my family and friends through that medium. But the relationships that really matter will be fostered offline...like the OLDEN DAYS of the 80s and 90s.
So, although you won't see me on Facebook, you can always e-wave at me here by posting a comment on any post, I read them all!